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Mount Calvary Baptist Church (Singapore)

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7 Tips for a God Honouring Dating

20/6/2013

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by Samuel Chng

1.    Be a non-conformist
Don’t let the world squeeze you into its mould, “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.” – Romans 12:1

Don’t let Hollywood or your friends be your guide to what is proper and improper in dating. Your standard should be God’s Word, the Bible.

Your unsaved friends will probably laugh at you for this, but we shouldn’t be surprise, as “The natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.” – 1 Corinthians 2:14.

2.    Honour your parents
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise)” – Ephesians 6:1-2.

As children, we need to obey our parents in the Lord and submit to the rules and regulations they set down concerning dating.
3.    Rejoice in God’s sovereign control over your life
As a child of God, He has a wonderful plan for your life for “we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to this purpose.” – Romans 8:28.

God will not allow you to miss that special person because: God is never late; we have to wait on Him.

“Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.” – Psalms 27:14

Isaac was 40 when he married Rebekah!

4.    Avoid having a one-person complex
It is possible (and common occurrence) for us to become interested in just one boy or girl to the exclusion of everyone else. It is important that we reach out and be concerned for all our peers and seek to include people, instead of leaving them out.

More importantly, the most important person that we should have a relationship with is the Lord Jesus Christ! Never make a ‘god’ out of another person.

5.    Develop healthy friendships with members of the opposite gender
Church, school, neighbourhood, etc, can present excellent opportunities for us to build wholesome relationships with others. Group activities in these settings (that are approved by parents and pleasing to God) are good ways of getting to know others.

One useful question that we could ask ourselves would be whether our closest friends fear God and obey His Word?

6.    Don’t rush into dating prematurely
Most young people start dating at too early an age. While there’s certainly no fixed answer on when is the right age, there are some useful guidelines that we could abide by:
  • Is it conflicting with my relationship with God?
  • Is it affecting my relationship with my parents?
  • Am I able to balance this with my studies? Is it affecting my grades?
  • Is it isolating me from my friends?

7.    Don’t frown upon singleness
Singlehood is a gift of God.  It is a very special time in our lives when we are free from the duties and responsibilities of marriage, and thus free to serve the Lord.

You may not be single forever, so make the most out of this time to serve God!

And, marriage is not for everyone. Some of God’s most faithful servants have been men and women who have been single all their lives. One good example is the apostle, Paul (I Corinthians 7:6-9) and, of course, the Lord Jesus Christ Himself!

(Edelweiss Issue 10: June 2013)
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